well, it has been a year since my cousin Brian took his own life. so awful. it is still hard to believe and today it feels like it happened just last week. he would have been 34 now while his son Fergus is now 5. our family is determined to never let him forget who his dad was and all of the wonderful people whose lives he touched. it is just such a waste and shame that he felt so alone and helpless back then....i kind of have that weird feeling in my stomach. it kind of hurts and flutters all at the same time. it started yesterday and comes in waves. maybe just more of a reminder to how i felt last july. as they say, he is gone but not forgotten...
enough sadness for now. i am going to focus my energy more on reflecting on life and relationships. since this occurred, i don't take things nor people for granted. i try to let those around me know that they are a special part of my life as we all know that life can be far too short.
Brian Rubin 3/27/74 - 7/15/07
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